Til Eternity, My Friend

Many of you know what an intertwined relationship my family has with the Patterson family. From the moments Kelly and I first drew breath on this earth, we have been a part of that family and they of ours.

My dad and Dr. Doug Patterson have been best friends since grade school in Mobile, Alabama. They went to University of Montevallo together; they did ROTC together; they were fraternity brothers; they went to Vietnam together after they commissioned as active duty Marine Corps officers together.

When my dad went to be president of the Alabama Institute for Deaf and Blind, Dr. Patterson was his vice president. We grew up with their children - Lauren (their middle daughter) is my sister's lifelong best friend. They are like our siblings.

When we moved to Troy, AL in 1989, the Pattersons came too: he became vice chancellor while my dad was chancellor at the University. My parents were at the hospital when their oldest, Chris, and then Lauren and Natalie were born, and vice versa. There hasn't been a moment of my life that the Patterson family hasn't had an incredible presence, and I love them as if we shared the same blood. We lived within miles of each other. We played together. We vacationed together. We love each other.

About a month ago, Chris (who is several years older than I am) went on a cruise. While on vacation, he got sick. He tried to be seen by the doctor upon his return but the doctor kept encouraging him to treat the fever at home. The fever broke and he began feeling better, but only temporarily. He relapsed and was admitted immediately and placed into ICU.

For 3 weeks, Chris was on a ventilator, under heavy sedation and prayed for. His family rallied around his bedside and became prayer warriors for Chris. Natalie was able to come home from Florida State University, where she's a 2nd year law student and Lauren was able to make it home just less than a week ago from Ecuador where she's a professor.

We thought we had lost him last Sunday when his blood oxygen level dipped into the 30th percentile. But Chris came back and regained a 100% blood oxygen level the next day. They thought he might be coming out of the woods. We truly believed a miracle was taking place in his healing journey.

During his stay in ICU, he developed double pneumonia and ARDS. He also had 1/5 documented cases of Swine Flu (H1N1) that caused blood clots. The doctors had a terrible time trying to balance thinning his blood with treating the pneumonia.

My parents decided to come on out to Louisiana for Thanksgiving after going to Columbus, GA to see Chris and realizing he might be on the upswing. So we enjoyed a wonderful holiday but continued to cover Chris in prayer as a family from afar.

On Friday, 27 November, my family took me out for a delayed birthday celebration. When we returned to my and Dan's home, we got the call that Chris's blood oxygen level was below 10% and dropping. Within 10 minutes, Chris passed away leaving his family and so many people who loved him deeply with broken, shattered, shocked hearts. Yesterday (Saturday), we woke up and packed the cars and left for home as soon as possible.

Christopher Clarke Patterson was one of a kind. He was so much like his mom, Mrs. Lise: blonde, tall, handsome, quiet, funny. He was a man of few words but when he spoke, you listened and usually laughed. My first crush was on Chris when I was about 7 years old!

There are no words to explain the depth of pain that his precious family is experiencing right now. Everyone prayed SO HARD for Chris and we were confident he had pulled through. But we have to remember that God's ways are always higher than our ways. Yet that never makes the pain of losing a loved one more bearable. Never.

Tomorrow is Chris's visitation and Tuesday will be his funeral and burial. His funeral will be in Troy but they will bury Chris in Birmingham next to his grandfather who he adored and resembled so very much. We will bury a son, a brother, a friend, a great, great, great man who is gone long before we all thought it was time. This is so unnatural: parents are never supposed to bury their children.

Our world - for those of us who knew and loved Chris - is very sad right now. There is a pain surrounding all of us that will not soon depart. Even if you didn't know Chris Patterson, I ask you all to please pray for his mom and dad and sisters, Lauren and Natalie. It is their hearts that are truly breaking now and will break for days, months and years to come.

Thanksgiving 2009

We have had a fabulous time with my family here in Louisiana visiting us. We have cooked, eaten, laughed, played, slept - and enjoyed every single minute of it. Noah's been in HEAVEN with Jan-Jan, Keddy and Graddy all here! He's got a new playmate at every turn and has had a blast being the center of attention.

We got a new Persian kitten for my 30th birthday last week. Her name is Gumbo (Dan named her) and Dan bought her for me - he completely surprised me. 2 weeks ago, we went and looked at the litter and I picked out the kitten I wanted. I went and bought everything necessary to bring her home. She was to be my bday present from Dan. However, the next day, the lady called me and told me that she'd been accidentally sold by her husband who didn't know she'd been promised to me... I was sooo sad! I have had the hardest time getting over Maria so this was a blow.

That happened on Monday but Friday morning (my birthday), Dan woke up, showered and put his uniform on like any normal day. About an hour later, he came into the house with the same kitty I had been told had been sold! Whoo hoo! I was so surprised. Good Danny :) And Piper and Noah love this little gal. Dan was the person to have bought her so the lady didn't TOTALLY tell a lie.

This weekend, we are loading up the Hawkins/Beall clan and heading down to Lafayette, Louisiana for the Troy/ULL game. It is the final game of the regular season and we are excited to go cheer on the Trojans. It will be so much fun staying at a hotel with my family - we always have a blast at away Troy games. And we are getting ready for the New Orleans Bowl in December!

Tonight, we are all going out to celebrate my 30th bday as a family. It is a week past my day but my dad's taking us all out to dinner to have the "official" family party! I can't wait.

Small Announcement

We thought you would all want to know that our brood is expanding! We are very, very excited about this news.

November Cuteness

I just love my little Noah. He's not so little anymore... 21 months and 32 pounds. But he just adores his Mama and his Daddy. And I have never felt more blessed. He thinks it is hilarious to climb onto the dining table and "eat" the fake fruit and cinnamon pinecones on display next to the Waterford candleabras I also have on the table....

Noah experienced his first Louisiana State Fair. It was quite the experience... Never seen more rednecks and interesting people in all our lives but we had a great time. We shared some fudge soaked funnel cakes, a huge family-size ice cream cone and a couple of "Noah" rides. He had a lot of fun. (You might notice some red spots on his nose... that is because he insisted on running as fast as possible down our neighbor's driveway and busted his nose up from here to next Halloween.)

This month, he's enjoyed celebrating his Daddy's 30th birthday and will also enjoy opening gifts on my 30th birthday (Friday, November 20th). Any present wrapped seems to turn into a present for Noah! Dan got the most amazing home surround sound system possible and Noah had so much fun setting it up with his Daddy. On Dan's birthday morning, we had huge, hot cinnamon rolls, cheesy eggs and fresh fruit. Noah (surprise, surprise) thought it was in celebration of him! Dan recieved tons of sweet cards from friends and family and awesome gifts like (size 14... impossible to find!) Quiksilver flip-flops.

He also loves to swing in our backyard. The swingset we have is dilapidated but "Santa Jan-Jan and Graddy" are bringing him a NEW swingset this year. He's never gonna be as excited as I am about this!

We are getting ready for the holidays around here: he frequently sings his versions of Christmas songs and likes to rearrange the ornaments on "Jan-Jan's tree" (we have the tree in the guest room and in Noah's room already up since Jan-Jan, Graddy and Aunt Keddy come this weekend.) He LOVES school. Each Tuesday and Thursday morning, Noah wakes up talking about "Tarlie, Tarlie" (Charlee, Charlee - his 1 year old school-girlfriend) and "Ubbbbaaa - Ubbbbbaaa" (his teacher has taught him "Hubba-hubba"). Below is one of the styling outfits he wore to his school to impress the ladies!

My February 20th

I have been a Christian for the majority of the life that I can remember. I remember being in my bed in Talladega, Alabama with my mom and my sister and accepting Jesus into my heart. However, I couldn't have been more than 5 years old.

I remember the glow of the hallway light reflecting off of the beautiful face of my Mama and the way my sister and I were laying in my white bed and the yellow flowered wallpaper covering the walls of the dark room. I can still hear the tape "Good Night, Sleep Tight" playing softly on the cassette player in the bathroom between my and Kelly's rooms.

Fast forward to February 13, 1993. I was a stupid 13 year old suffering acne, being too skinny and too tall and too big footed for my age (I wore a size 10 shoe, was 5'7.5" tall and weighed a whopping 100 lbs). I was suffering through my first crushes, my first heartaches caused by mean "best" friends and many other ailments that a 13 year old suffers.

But at the Sunday church service at Disciple Now 1992, I made my way down the aisle at the First Baptist Church of Troy (before all of the gorgeous renovations - green carpet, bad fake flowers, and all). And in front of my mom, dad and Kelly and along with several of my close girl friends, I professed publicly that Jesus was indeed the Lord of my life.

You all know that I do a lot of my time with the Lord these days while I am out on my morning jogs. I tune into my iPod and listen to my favorites praise God: NeedtoBreathe, Fernando Ortega, Amy Grant, Third Day, Mercy Me. But today was spent listening to one of my all time favorites, Steven Curtis Chapman. Many of you know that in May of 2008, his son accidentally ran over one of his precious adopted daughters. Her name was Maria and she was 5 when she died. He just released his new album "Beauty Will Rise" this past month. To try to explain the depths of grief he dives into is futile; you can only know how painful that album (and his journey has been) is if you listen to it.

One of his songs is entitled "February 20th." He wrote it in honor of the day that his sweet daughter, Maria, accepted Jesus into her heart. Here are several lines of the lyrics:

"February 20th 2008
on the floor with her mom putting her shoes on
getting ready for another day
February 20th she says mom is it true
does God really have a big big house
and does it really have a lot of rooms.
and she said i really really want to go there
and i said so why don't we just talk to him.
and that's what we did February 20th

February 20th i did my best to explain.
how it is that we all want to be with god
how it was the savior came.
February 20th
if its true what he said that god himself sang along with the beautiful song of rejoicing in heaven
and she prayed Jesus come and please live in my heart.and someday can i come live with you
and we could never had imagined that'd she'd be going there so soon..."

My heart cried out as I listened to that song. When I publicly professed to my little world in 1993 that Jesus was my Lord, I did so exactly 15 years and 1 day to the day that I brought Noah into this world. I had no idea the responsibility that I would be taking on in a decade and a half from that day.

Now I have a beautiful almost-2-year-old who, at the end of every day, asks to say his "paaayers" with me and his daddy. Noah finishes our prayers as a family at night with a great big "AMMMMEENNNN." He says many times a day "I yuv you, Jeee-sus." My eyes fill with tears everytime I hear him say that.

While he doesn't yet understand the gravity of what he's saying when he tells Jesus he loves him, he will one day. And that is a responsibility that Dan and I do NOT take lightly. We know that it is our duty to teach him about who Jesus is and why, how, when He died. I long for the day that I can be present when my little one accepts MY Lord into his innocent little heart. I cannot wait to be witness to Noah's "February 20th."

Great Success!

Noah's a mess and loves to talk about his private parts and his urine and the act of urinating. He loves "Elmo's Potty Time" and talks about "tee-tee potty" all day long, but since he's a boy (first of all) and since he's only 20 months old, I haven't had it a priority to start seriously potty training him. Sure, we have the step up potty seat that goes over the big potty but short of letting him sit there and play, we haven't pressed the issue. Why press it and scare him off the idea, I say?!

But just last night, my 20 month old (which seems young to me...) ran to the potty sans diaper and said "tee tee, mommy?" So I pulled out the step up potty and let him sit there.... He tee-teed!!! I couldn't believe it! I tried not to overreact so I didn't startle him but I was excited.

Then today, we all 3 were out doing yardwork and got super dirty. So, I put Noah in the shower with me (he LOVES that). After the shower, he was doing his normal running-around-naked routine and in the middle of jumping on a pile of pillows, ran into the bathroom where I was putting on make up to say "potty mommy." I put him up on the potty and he started GRUNTING! He pooped!!! I am such a proud mommy I can't stand it.

He's such a baby to me in so many ways but he's growing up so fast. The kid can count straight to 15 for crying out loud. And he makes me and Dan question ourselves when we are driving because he sees things we would NEVER notice normally. He sees horses on billboards, busses a mile away, kitty cats on the side of the road... Noah's line of sight amazes me constantly.

I am overwhelmed by the blessing of that little boy. When I was told that my child would be the love of my life, I never, ever, never imagined the immense, incredible love that Noah would inflict in my heart. He's so smart, so beautiful, so sweet. He is even incredibly sensitive: when I pick him up from Mother's Day Out, there is an elderly gentleman in a wheelchair who's absolute joy in life is to sit by the door of the church and watch the kids coming and going. Noah makes a point to run up to him - and anyone, kid or adult, in a wheelchair - and hug them and say "Hi-iiii." He wants to make everyone feel special and his unpredjudicial attitude towards all moves me so much.

I am a proud, proud mom.

From the Mouth of MY Babe

My sweet little boy has always been a talker. He's been babbling since he was about 6-7 months old. He is just like my grandfather he was named after: a preacher man from Ireland! Noah's got the "gift of gab," there is no doubt.

He is only 20 months old and can count to FIFTEEN! I am not kidding you: he has been counting for about a month and sometimes goes from 1-5 and then 7,9,10, but in the past week, he's learned to go all the way to 15. I am not exaggerating that - I will videotape it and let you guys see what a genius this kid is.

Here are some other wild words that are in his regular vocabulary:
- Helicopter (comes out hel, lel, lel...opter but you get the drift!)
- I hear airplane: I eah ahhh-paanne
- I yuv u, Mommy - melts my heart
- Jan-Jan, Graddy, Poppy, Grammy, Keddy, Papu: his grandparents, Aunt Kelly and his dog, Piper
- He loves to yell at horsies and airplanes flying overhead: "Come heuh now!"
- Shoes, juice, food, car, truck, BUS!, book, puppy, kitty-cat... he says so many words - I could go on and on.
- Tyrone, Melmo: he loves these two t.v. characters
- Nemo: comes out "Meemo" but we got him a Beta fish this week and he named it "Nemo"

He's been naming body parts for a while, mostly his privates! He's fascinated with his "tee-tee," "boobies," and "bum-bum." His new favorite game is to sneak up on me or Dan when we are changing and hit our "bum bums." A flattering picture but, hey, I am honest! He LOVES to do that.

And just today while at the Base Exchange and while we were waiting in line right in front of about 7 pilots, Noah reaches up from the cart, grabs my chest and YELLS "Mommy's boobies!" I WAS HORRIFIED. I whispered quickly in his ear that that was Mommy's private part and he should be quiet but the damage was done and my face turned scarlet. The pilots got a huge kick out of it!

This afternoon, he was being especially trying. He grabbed my water bottle, unscrewed it and ran into the middle of the living room where he dumped out the whole thing. The entire time I was yelling for him to stop but he defied me. So, I got up, spanked him and put him immediately into his crib for a "time out."

Right away, he threw his toys and blankets over the side of the crib and screamed bloody murder. After a few minutes when he'd calmed down a bit, I went back in and got into his face and asked him if he understood why he was in time out. He said "Mommy, Watee (water), Soddy (sorry)." So, I said "When Mommy says no, you are supposed to obey me." He responded with "Okay Mommmeeeee" and continued to sob. But we hugged, said we loved each other and he went and picked up his favorite toys, Tyrone and Elmo, and placed them back into his crib. Dr. Dobson would have been proud of me.

Ahh, my little talker: already embarrassing me!

Halloween 2009

We had a great day! Although the levee right next to our home has broken and homes are being evacuated in our subdivision, we were able to get out and trick or treat with our friends, let Noah run around in his Elmo costume and then put him down so we could join our neighbors for our Halloween Block Party. It was a wonderful day!

So far, our home hasn't gotten any damage from the 20+" of rain (a first ever record here for October), our neighbors' home flooded badly. But they are safe and are slowly repairing the house. The waters will not crest for a few more days so we are continuing to pray that the levee holds and that this water is dried up by the now-gorgeous weather. We shall see! I guess this is just a side-effect of living in Louisiana next to a levee! The pastures next to the house where Noah likes to go see the horsies are now lakes - they are under about 3-5 feet of water. It is very sad.

We aren't being mandatorily evacuated yet and hope not to be. But our bags are packed just in case. Who knows where we will go... never been in this type of sitatution. The homes 2-3 blocks from ours though have been evacuated so it is definitely a likelihood we too will have to get out of here.

Noah loves "Melmo" and had a fun time being him for Halloween. He was so cute! And I was Dan's nurse because he dressed up as (I know, this is so politically incorrect..) Swine Flu. We won for best couple's costume! It was a great night!

Tonight we are taking Noah to the Louisiana State Fair. It is cold and with a full moon should be such a perfect fall night. We can't wait!