Some Cuties...

Someone is going to have a lot to get used to with a new baby around here! But one thing that won't change: Noah is a "daddy's boy" 100%. That has been a fact since Day 1 and no matter how much our Ellyotte might steal her daddy's heart, Noah will always be Dan's boy. They are literally two peas in a pod and I am so thankful for the bond they share.

Lasts

I am enjoying (or doing) a couple of "lasts" starting today:

- Noah is at Mother's Day Out for the last time without having a baby sister around. I took him in and left with my hands empty of the carseat I will be carrying with Ellyotte in it from here on out.
- I am enjoying my LAST day with my son at Mother's Day Out and me home/running around alone - and am trying to relax as much as possible. Because from now on, when he's gone, I will still have a baby on my hip!
- Tonight, I will enjoy my LAST night for a while alone with Dan. We put Noah to bed between 6:30 and 7 each night and once he's down, that's our time. Tomorrow my folks get here followed by Kelly and then many other visitors. So things will remain quiet for tonight and then will get nuts!
- I made my last trip to Wal-Mart kidless (or maybe period!) for a while. I anticipate a long recovery from the second c-section and that I won't be doing much grocery shopping. And when I do, again, I will have at least one kiddo with me!
- And what is affecting me most emotionally..... Tomorrow will be my last day with Noah - just the two of us. With the arrival of my parents and Dan's paternity leave starting Monday, we will never again be alone in our house just "Mommy and Noah." I am tearing up thinking about how special tomorrow will be for us. I hope to enjoy (and have the energy to enjoy) every precious moment with him. He deserves it.

Life's changing in a matter of days. Dan and I comment each night how we are one day closer to having a baby in the Pack n Play that is set up in the corner of our room. Nights won't be as peaceful as we are used to for a while! The house won't be as clean as it is now for a while! It's about to get very unpredictable.

We are so excited for what is to come but so nervous too: neither of us have ever changed a little girl's diaper.... Never. Not once. Boys diapers are soooo easy to change - you don't have to worry about which way you wipe, or infections (ew, I know) so we are both nervous about that! And I know she's gonna be a tiny baby - she might be long like her daddy and brother, but we don't expect her to be anything but tiny. I am just not as big as I was with Noah - and while she takes up the majority of the room in my tummy, she's just not as big as I felt Noah was.

We have to get used to being very careful with a new baby! Noah and Dan play so rough.. He's a boy: that's what you are supposed to do! Noah's got his bear set up in Ellyotte's swing and we have been working on teaching him how to hold the baby and how to gently rock her, feed her, etc. He will be so sweet: he will wrap the bear in a blanket, hold it, talk to it, and then when he's done... He slams the bear across the room! AHHH. We are going to have to watch his every single move for a while.

Noah's excited: the other morning when he woke up, he patted my tummy and said "Ellyotte, you come out NOW." Then that same night when I tucked him in, he pointed to my belly and said "Ellyotte come out and take a nap right here?" (as he patted the pillow next to him). He gets the idea - and I am thankful for that.

I continue to ask for prayer in this time of change. We have a lot of changes (amazing ones) facing us and I am a bit nervous. I ask that you pray that I have the energy and patience to make tomorrow very, very special for Noah. And, I am still nervous about my surgery and I ask that you pray that it goes well and that she comes out screaming and healthy - no matter what my nervous state may be. Until the next update....!

Last Appointment Update!

Today was my final "check up" appointment. I am scheduled for another next Tuesday so I can get my paperwork and bloodwork done for the c-section which is still scheduled for first thing Wednesday morning. But today was the last normal one.

I have lost 3 pounds - which didn't surprise me. Ellyotte STILL hasn't "dropped" and she perpetually has a foot stuck so far up in my diaphram that it is extremely uncomfortable to eat too much. I am not dilated at all - not a bit. So I was a bit disappointed to learn that - but not really since it doesn't affect the surgery.

My parents come Friday and then Kelly comes out the day of the c-section. My doctor told me that they will likely keep me in the hospital for 3 days so that might be annoying - I will be SUPER ready to get Ellyotte home by then! But it might be a good break from being a full-time mom to a 2 year old :) He will love having his Jan-Jan and Graddy and Aunt Kelly here with him.

There wasn't much to update you guys on, but I wanted to let you know how the appointment went today. Noah started his breathing treatments and was really excited to have a mask put on his face! It was cute - he wanted to play with it after we gave him his puffs of Albuterol. It is still sad to have to do the treatments, but if they help rid of the cough, then they are necessary.

Okay... I am going to try to go to sleep. But for all of you who have been 39 weeks pregnant before, you know the level of discomfort that accompanies this late date of pregnancy! But... the babies are worth it, right?!

Diagnosis

Well, with 8.5 days to go till Ellyotte arrives, we have finally been given a diagnosis for Noah's cough and breathing issues: he has asthma. Not at ALL what we wanted to hear but at least we know what the problem is and can go from here.

He's been ordered to finish the current round of antibiotics, stay on allergy meds, start a liquid steroid for 5 days and begin Albuterol breathing treatments starting today. We will be seen again on Friday by his pediatrician and hopefully referred to a pulmonologist from there.

Poor baby - I hate to medicate him but I hate this cough even worse. I have asthma (diagnosed at 24), my uncle had it, my sister has it and my grandfather had it. So, since it is hereditary, it isn't surprising.

I will keep you posted. Not good news but this is a good starting point to getting our boy back to "normal."

Update on Noah

So many of you have been praying for Noah's coughing situation and I appreciate it. I felt that I needed to provide an update - even though I really don't have any new information (several of you have been asking through Facebook what his status is).

We literally have had Noah on and off of antibiotics since the December/January timeframe. He might get better for a few days from the cough but then it returns. He's been on allergy meds, steroids, cough syrups and about 5 different antibiotic types. It is so sad. I constantly have to keep him on probiotics or Immodium to keep his little digestive system from going into antibiotic overdrive.

We got his chest x-rayed on Thursday and didn't hear back from the doctor on Friday. She told us that if we didn't hear anything, then we could expect that the x-ray didn't reveal anything new. And even though I called her, she never called me back Friday.

He was SUCH a sport! Dan took him to get his x-rays and told him he was going to "get a picture of your chest with a big ole camera." So Noah kept saying: "Get picture of my big ole chest!" What a cutie. He did so well - he actually wanted to "do again." Nothing scares him: the dentist, the doctor, school - he's such a social little boy! I am thankful for that.

Tomorrow, I will begin the process of trying to get referred off-base (Noah is seen by an Air Force provided pediatrician) ENT and/or allergist doctor. Something's gotta give: he's on yet another antibiotic and allergy medicine yet the deep, wet coughing hasn't gone away.

We want our "baby" well before Ellyotte comes and PERIOD. No more medicines in his delicate little system - we want answers. So please pray we find out how to treat this cough and that he's healed.

Enough Love?

I cannot believe that in 10 days, we will be holding Ellyotte. There are so many thoughts that run through my head: who will she look like?, will she have red hair?, will she be temperamental yet sweet spirited like her brother?...

But the biggest concern I have is: will I be able to love her as much as I love Noah????

Wow. That is a huge confession for me. But I hear that it is common for second time moms to be worried that they won't have enough love to go around. I KNOW that I will, but I just wonder HOW will it be possible? I love Noah so much that my heart aches.

I remember blogging back when he was a newborn about rocking him and crying until my eyes hurt. I had never, ever known love like that before. Certainly, I love his daddy wholly - but it is a different kind of love. There will never be another Dan - no one will ever measure up to the man that I love and am committed to cherish for the rest of my life. However, as much as I love Dan, I cannot compare the love that I have for my child to that I have for my husband... It is just different.

So where does that leave Ellyotte? I guess this is just going to be different all around: she's our first daughter, the first granddaughter for both sides, Noah's first baby sister. She will inevitably fill a hole in this little family of 3 that we have and I just am anxious and excited to see the joy she will bring to all of us.

I am still experiencing nausea - and I still think that my doctor is right when she says it is just my body's way of cleaning itself out in prep for labor (although, I still highly doubt I will ever experience that). But I also wonder if I am not having some issues with my nerves. My whole life, I have gotten a "nervous tummy" over the slightest thing. It has gotten better with age, but I used to drop weight so quickly growing up because the slightest thing would set me off and I would fret, fret and fret some more until I couldn't eat or function well.

And to be honest, I am getting very nervous about cesarean section #2. The first birthing experience with Noah was soooo miserable and soooo upsetting that I thought for a while I'd never want to go through it again. (For those of you who weren't tuned into the blog back then, I went 10 days past my due date, was induced and allowed to labor for 36 hours before having an emergency c-section. The epidural that they gave me right before the surgery didn't "take" quickly enough so I felt a lot of pinching during the surgery and I.FREAKED.OUT to the point that they had to sedate me on the operating table. Not a good experience.)

After all of that, I wasn't able to breastfeed more than a couple of weeks - I just didn't have the milk. I would literally pump for an hour and get a teaspoon total. So I resented the fact that Noah had to take formula for months - I felt like a total failure till one day, I had to give it to the Lord and beg Him to allow me to let go of the guilt I felt for not being able to provide "naturally" for my baby. I had prepared for a natural birth and then wanted to breastfeed Noah for his first year of life. Nothing worked out the way I had planned it - and I am a planner.

So this time around, I have tried to not plan as much. We have her birthday on the calendar and our bags are packed and family is planning on being here, but aside from that, I have diapers, the pump out, and enough clothes for the first few months. This time around, I haven't planned out anything like I did last time. My expectations are non-existant regarding the surgery, the recovery and the breastfeeding (there's a can of formula on hand - just in case).

I have reached the "stick-a-fork-in-me-I'm-done" point and am so thankful for the weekend with Dan home and for Noah still going to Mother's Day Out twice a week. Even though sleep eludes me right now because of the discomfort, I am trying to rest as much as possible. But, I am soooo done with being pregnant for a while and am just looking forward to loving on our sweet baby girl SOON!

Another Appointment Update

Today I had my 38 week appointment. I guess technically it is my 37 week appointment because I will have my c-section at 39 weeks. But... whatever. The doctor said it was 38 weeks because I guess they make the due date the day I will actually deliver. So 38 weeks it is!

Anyway, I had my appointment today and it went well. Despite monstrous contractions, though, I am still not dilated at all and Ellyotte hasn't yet dropped. My doctor just shrugged her shoulders and reminded me that Noah's arrival was the exact same: I never progressed at all and had a c-section then.

She said that some women just never have that "natural" experience, for whatever reason. She said sometimes your pelvic structure, your genetics, many things can contribute to lack of the natural labor process.

All that said, Ellyotte's heartbeat is still in the 140s and she's still very active and growing. That is good - I am thankful that our baby is thriving and even though I am BEYOND miserable (!!!) I am looking forward to these next 2 weeks as a small family of 3.

My mom and dad come out next weekend to get some time with Noah and me and Dan and we are excited to have them here. Maybe we will even utilize their babysitting services and have a date while they are here the weekend before she arrives!

Until next update...!

Fun in the Bayou

Yesterday we went to visit Natchitoches, Louisiana which is about an hour from here. It is the CUTEST Bayou town that was founded in 1714 and was where the movie "Steel Magnolias" was filmed. We had an incredible time.

I had been several times before throughout the '90s when Troy University used to play Northwestern State University there in football. But I don't remember a ton about those trips... It was great to go back and experience it with Dan and Noah.

We started in the historic district and had some fun on the banks of the river and then went to lunch at a famous, Creole restaurant there on the riverfront. After lunch, we went to the Alligator Farm - SOOO much fun! Noah fell asleep on the way to it and we thought about just driving on home but had already told him we were going to see the animals so we knew if we didn't take him and he woke up asking about it that we would pay! So, he only got a 10 minute nap but it was extremely worth it.

We fed the gators, goats, deer, ducks, turtles... and got really dirty and hot in the process. We learned that Louisiana has about 2.4 million wild alligators - not something that I am entirely comfortable with knowing!

It was a great day and one of the last fun field trips with just the 3 of us. Next time, Ellyotte will be in tow


!

Here are the links to some of the video footage I took of the boys.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BFCbqx95Ook - Watching the snakes
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=unNZQbcaNpA - Feeding the goats

Thanks!

I appreciate the emails and the comments I got regarding the nausea. Obviously, the nausea (for me) didn't mean that labor was imminent... at least not yet. But I was sick enough that my doctor called in a prescription for Zofran - which I never have used before. So far, it is working. Yet I am still a bit nausceous.

We are playing the waiting game. It dawned on me today how seriously close her arrival is - 2.5 weeks isn't a long time at all. Yet, every minute seems to drag by! I am hormonal on all levels - impatient, antsy, agitated and yelling at the poor dog way too much. I am hoping that all of this agitation is alleviated when she arrives... We shall see.

Thanks again everyone. I am so happy that I can post something on my blog and know that many of you moms are ready and willing to respond right away with advice and/or encouragement. Thank you, thank you!

Oh, the Nausea

I was not ever sick at all in the beginning with either Noah or with this pregnancy. But, starting last night, I have been sick as a dog with what I assume feels like first trimester nausea yet I am now 37 weeks pregnant.

My friend next door just had her third via c-section last week and she said she had it and it is your body's way of "cleaning itself out." But this stinks! I slept maybe 2 hours total last night from discomfort and sickness and I have been weak with nausea all day.

Any of you other mom friends out there ever have this? If so, how long does it last and why is it happening? What'd you do for it?