In the Blink of an Eye...

I am exhausted. But I wanted to thank you all for your prayers. Most of you know that on Tuesday, I got a blod clot that traveled to my lung (pulmonary embolism). I was short of breath all day on Tuesday and my mom was so worried about me. She finally made me call the doctor, we were sent immediately into the ER and I had a CAT scan. They discovered the clot and admitted me into the heart unit immediately. I had an ultrasound on my legs and the clot didn't develop there so we aren't sure where it came from. But, it lodged in my lung and the fact that it didn't take my life right away isn't lost on me.

The doctor came into my ER room a bit frantic - this was more serious than I thought it would be. He told me about the clot... in my lung and the ball got rolling. My symptoms were primarily shortness of breath all day and faintness and had it not been for my mom, I wouldn't be here to type this blog entry. I don't know how much time I had, but apparantly (according to doctors) not much. Mind you, this was all happening less than a week after my c-section with Ellyotte so I had been through a lot already.

I am still dealing with the intensity of the fact that a miracle was performed on me and I was spared. All the doctors that saw me told me how thankful I should be to be alive, all the nurses said the same thing, and my own uncle (mom's brother) died from a blod clot that developed after knee surgery. So, it runs in my family.

We are waiting to find out if this was caused by the c-section or if I have a clotting disorder. I should find out within the week the blood results. I was released from the hospital last night and sent home on bedrest and in the care of home health care. I receive twice daily shots into my stomach (blood thinner) and am on twice the normal doseage of Coumadin (another thinner). I will be on Coumadin for at least the next 6-9 months but most likely on it for the rest of my life. I am on pain killers and literally only allowed to walk from point A to B. Not an easy time for me right now physically.

My dad and sister came right back into town to help out with the babies and Dan is taking time off indefinitely to be here. He will be home at least till my Lovanox stomach shots are done after the next week. Dan has to administer the shots to me each day, twice a day. He has done better than any nurse has done for me. Maybe because he cares the most about me! And my home health care nurse comes each day to do my blood work and check vitals, etc. They have to closely monitor my blood and my reaction to the thinners. As of this afternoon, my levels were not where they need to be. I am at a 1.3 and need to be within 2-3 at this point. So we are praying the thinners and the increased doseages begin to really do their jobs (another prayer request).

Ellyotte is doing well, she has been a wonderful baby given that she was away from me for 2 days and nights. Poor Dan had baby duty and my mom had Noah duty 24/7 - not good with a breast feeding baby. I had to pump constantly to relieve myself since she couldn't be in the hospital with me - I only got to nurse her once in the two days I was there. I got so engourged one night that I slept with ice packs! I was desparate for Ellyotte to visit me the next day... It was a long wait. Thankfully, she got right back to nursing as soon as I returned and thankfully, all of the medicines I am on (including the thinners) are okay for me to continue trying to nurse. We were floored by that because I am on a lot of medication right now.

Noah had many meltdowns - he did as well as could be expected given all of the changes he's been through this past week: mom and dad gone to have baby sister, new sister arrives, mom and dad still gone, new baby comes home, mom can't do much while healing, then mom disappears again leaving baby at home... He wanted me home so bad and didn't understand, but he remained sweet despite the changes (well, for the most part!).

I have to go feed a sweet baby girl and get a shot in the tummy - boo. But know that your prayers were so appreciated and I am thankful for you all for lifting me and my family up before the Throne. The thoughts of not being around while my children grew up and not being a wife to my husband has wrecked me. But satan will not win this battle - our home is not his for the taking. I am so glad to be home again and while bedrest is tough and being waited on in my own home is tough, and while I am weaker than I can ever remember being before, I am the most thankful I have ever been for life and the beauty of each breath.

Thank you again, I have to say that it was because of the prayers of the faithful that I am healing and am home.